A Study on Friendship

Study on Friendship

Recently I was asked to conduct a study on Friendship and share my findings. This blog will share some of my perspectives and results. I have also included a few of the slides from my presentation.

Friendship is a fundamental aspect of human life, providing numerous benefits and enriching our overall well-being. In this study, we will explore the advantages of friendship and discuss the qualities that make someone a good friend.

According to the Mental Health Foundation: 69% of adolescents aged 13-19 said they felt alone “often” or “sometimes” in the last two weeks on average and 59% feel they have no one to talk to “often” or “sometimes” (Mental Health Foundation. Loneliness)

American families are spending less time together. Traditions like family meals are becoming obsolete when just a generation ago, they were routine.

The BBC conducted a large global loneliness survey in 2018 with 55,000 participants. Among respondents ages 16 to 24, 40% reported feeling lonely very often-young.scot

In the Bible, friendship is often regarded as a valuable and meaningful relationship. Proverbs 17:17 states, "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity." This verse emphasizes the importance of loyalty and support in friendships.

Proverbs 27:17 Which is one of my favorite verses.As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.

David Guzik puts it this way, “ As iron sharpens iron: A piece of iron can sharpen another piece of iron, but it happens through striking, friction, and with sparks. We think of the iron of a blacksmith’s hammer working on a sword to make it sharp.

b. So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend: A man can be used to sharpen (improve and develop) his friend, but it may happen through a bit of friction and sparks. We shouldn’t be afraid of such and expect that true sharpening can happen without the occasional use of friction.

Charles Bridges says this in his study on Proverbs: “Gladly let us take up the bond of brotherhood. If a brother seems to walk alone, sharpen his iron by godly communication. Walk together in mutual concern for each other’s infirmities, trials, and temptations.”

Biblestudytools.com says this about Proverbs: [Proverbs Is a Practical Guide to Forging True Friendship

Proverbs gives us wisdom for navigating the complexities of our relationships. And it doesn’t just address relationships in general, but also friendship in particular. For example, it teaches us what to look for in finding true friends (Prov. 13:20; Prov 22:24-25). It shows us why loyalty is so important for cultivating friendship (18:24; 19:6; 27:9–10). It also shows us the one thing that is most damaging to this kind of relationship: spreading secrets (16:28; 17:9).]

Additionally, the book of Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 highlights the benefits of having a friend, stating, "Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up." This passage emphasizes the mutual assistance and encouragement that can be found in friendships. When two work and live together they can help each other in difficult times

Amos has quickly become one of my favorite minor prophet books. The principle of friendship is also found in Amos. "Can two walk together, except they be agreed?" (Amos 3:3 KJV).

Got questions.org puts it this way

[Friends are of like mind. The truth that comes from all of this is a friendship is a relationship that is entered into by individuals, and it is only as good or as close as those individuals choose to make it. Someone has said that if you can count your true friends on the fingers of one hand, you are blessed. You can be yourself with a friend and never fear that he or she will judge you. A friend is someone that you can confide in with complete trust. A friend is someone you respect and that respects you, not based upon worthiness but based upon a likeness of mind.]

Furthermore, the New Testament encourages believers to cultivate friendships based on love, kindness, and forgiveness. In John 15:13, Jesus says, "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends." This verse emphasizes the sacrificial nature of true friendship.

LABC “The highest expression of love we could have for another would be laying down our life for someone else, just as Jesus did for those he loved. We must love each other sacrificially, as Jesus loved us, and he loved us enough to give up his life. We may not have to die for someone but we can practice sacrificial love in many other ways; listening, helping, encouraging, giving. We do not need to feel love for everyone. Some people will be difficult to love, but we are commanded to act lovingly towards others, especially fellow believers.”

Drew Hunter explains it this way: [The Cross Is History’s Most Heroic Act of Friendship

Jesus wants us to view the cross in terms of friendship. On the night before he died, as he explained the meaning of the cross to his disciples, Jesus said, “greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). The cross is certainly an act of substitutionary atonement, where Jesus bore the wrath of God in our place. But it is also, very personally, a relational act of friendship. ]

For more on this thought check out Drew Hunter’s book: Made For Friendship

Through his death, Jesus expressed the deepest love for his people. He did not die for an unspecified humanity; he died for specific people. He died for those he considered his dear friends.

In summary, from a biblical standpoint, friendship is seen as a valuable relationship that provides support, encouragement, and mutual assistance. It is a bond that is built on love, loyalty, and selflessness.

Four advantages of a healthy, positive, friendship are personal growth, health benefits, emotional support, and increased happiness.

Emotional Support:

One of the primary benefits of friendship is the emotional support it offers. Good friends provide a safe space for us to share our joys, sorrows, and challenges. They lend a listening ear, offer empathy, and provide comfort during difficult times. Having someone who understands and validates our emotions can significantly enhance our mental and emotional well-being.

Increased Happiness:

Friendship brings joy and happiness into our lives. Engaging in activities with friends, such as outings, hobbies, or simply spending quality time together, can boost our mood and create lasting memories. Good friends celebrate our successes, share in our happiness, and provide a sense of belonging and connection.

Health Benefits:

Research has shown that strong friendships have a positive impact on our physical health. Good friends can help reduce stress levels, lower blood pressure, and boost our immune system. They provide a sense of security and reduce feelings of loneliness, which can have detrimental effects on our overall health.

Personal Growth:

Friendship plays a vital role in our personal growth and development. Good friends challenge us to become better versions of ourselves. They offer constructive feedback, encourage us to pursue our goals and provide a support system for personal growth. Through their influence, we can learn new perspectives, acquire new skills, and expand our horizons.

1. Trustworthiness:

A good friend is someone we can trust wholeheartedly. They keep our secrets, honor their commitments, and are reliable in times of need. Trust forms the foundation of a strong and lasting friendship. Reflection Time: Do you honor your commitments?

2. Empathy and Understanding:

A good friend possesses the ability to empathize and understand our feelings and experiences. They listen attentively, offer support without judgment, and provide a shoulder to lean on. Their empathy creates a safe and nurturing environment for open communication.

3. Loyalty and Support:

A good friend stands by our side through thick and thin. They are loyal, supportive, and dependable. They offer encouragement, celebrate our successes, and provide a helping hand during challenging times. A good friend with also hold us accountable and challenge our perspective even when it is tough.

4. Communication and Respect:

Effective communication is crucial in any friendship. A good friend actively listens, communicates honestly, and respects our opinions and boundaries. They value open and honest dialogue, resolving conflicts with respect and understanding.

Conclusion:

Friendship is a precious gift that brings immense joy, support, and personal growth into our lives. The benefits of friendship extend beyond emotional well-being, positively impacting our physical health and overall happiness. By embodying qualities such as trustworthiness, empathy, loyalty, and effective communication, we can cultivate and nurture meaningful friendships that enrich our lives.

Remember, being a good friend is not only about receiving but also giving. By embodying these qualities, we can contribute to the well-being of our friends and create a positive and fulfilling friendship experience for all parties involved.

References:

- Smith, J. (2019). The Power of Friendship: How Friends Can Improve Your Life. Verywell Mind. Retrieved from

- Mayo Clinic Staff. (2020). Friendships: Enrich your life and improve your health. Mayo Clinic.

-Bridges) Bridges, Charles "Proverbs" (The Crossway Classic Commentaries) (Wheaton, Illinois: Crossway Books, 2001 edition of 1846 original)

-(2004). Life Application Bible Commentary (John) (p. 311). TYNDALE.

-Hunter, D. (2019, October 3). What Does the Bible Say About Friendship? Biblestudytools.com. Retrieved October 5, 2023, from https://www.biblestudytools.com/bible-study/topical-studies/what-does-the-bible-say-about-friendship.

-(2022, January 4). What is True Friendship According to the Bible? Gotquestions.org. Retrieved October 5, 2023, from https://www.gotquestions.org/true-friendship.html